guys are only as good as the porn they watch
You stayed up for three hours wasted, feeding my rabbit 2 1/2 boxes of girl scout cookies.
just skyped with my friend to listen in on the people talking shit about me in the library. creepy or strategic?
I think it is impossible 2 take a person seriously when their last name is Pancake
He came in looking for condoms, iced coffee, and a gas tank. I need to be where he's going.
I passed out in the stadium during the 4th quarter and you guys just left me there?
Yea, but we put money for a cab in your pocket.
I know your texting costs money, but I'll pay for it if you consider this. Oversized frozen jello shots. I'll buy everything needed if you approve. Let me know
Correction... Drunk on winter break. There are no days of the week on break.
He's not messing around tonight. 4 fist pumps.
Apparently I missed the "You may have to jack off a horse" part of the application.
He said he loves me but he haven't eaten me out yet. So I don't think he means it.
Twist bend and done? Jesus that sounds like a seventh grade hand job.
For not being a nurse or a sex worker I have seen an alarming amount of penises.
Stop thinking about me and go on your date... at least I got the glitter off your face first.
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
Randomize
