Would you feel weird if I asked out ___?
You dont call on our son's bday but you want to know if I'll give you permission to date my best friend?
So...no?`
He's so far in the closet he's in Narnia
I'm at the psychiatrist, and this lady is crazy.. she keeps yelling about how her HMO insurance gave her breast cancer? Adderall isn't worth this.
He was crying to my sister about feeling like a bad person. Then he groped my breasts.
his roommates stood outside the locked door reading bible verses to us the whole time...
He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
I have hooked up with someone in EVERYONE OF MY CLASSES.
That's how you know you deserve to be a senior
Don't let me forget to bring the toilet inside tonight.
No i'm not calming down the girl at white castle did not need to see the picture of my dick on your phone.
Just got offered to exchange moonshine for manscaping services by a gay guy. I'm gonna have the smoothest back in St. Louis county.
Man, I wish they all looked like that. Your vagina deserves to have a nice frame around it, and God's signature at the bottom.
I almost stepped in a homeless mans stream of urine as he was peeing. I love this city.
I didnt think the feeling of accomplishment for fucking brothers would be this great.
So high I started thinking my desktop picture of a cat was too erotic for the workplace.
Did you know that chef boy-ar-dee was a real person? I watched a show about him. the history of the ravioli is more scandalous than you would think.
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