I can't remember if we talked about feelings. Fuck you Miller High Life.
no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
I don't wanna hook up with anyone from minnesota
everybody there reminds me of mashed potatoes... white and lumpy
he has cookie breath... dont trust fat people.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you're the best thing to happen to me. closely followed by learning to ejaculate, and drugs.
And then she was like, "don't do anything. No blow jobs, don't let him stick his fingers in weird places because people have germs."
Someone is gonna learn how to start an IV in the morning
You insisted on squirting shots of captain morgan in your mouth with a turkey baster by like 930.
We're using joints as your birthday candles
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He brought her home and fucked her in a gingerbread man costume in a cardboard rapunzel castle. He had a pretty good night.
so I found out I could dislocate my shoulders on demand while I was trippin on e last night...
Want to do me the honour of waxing my legs again before I go to Mexico? I feel like it's a tradition we shouldn't break.
He compared my blow job skills to finding gold treasure in a gold chest, so there's that.
I can't remember the last time I saw a penis in person that I didn't see a million times on text first
I got arrested FOR running from the cops. In college Dad got arrested and THEN ran from the cops. So it could be worse.
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