my roommates friend slept in my bed when i was out of town..she ran out screaming cause she saw my VCR
I called Tyra Banks a whore to her face. A sure sign I should go home. Instead I went to the gay bar.
So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
i was trying to wake him up so i just kept touching his dick
Yes, yes she is. This will teach her not to pull her vibrator out and harass people with it at parties.
In your drunken brilliance did you make bagel with what appears to be mac and cheese smeared on top and pink icing dip? Because if so it is sitting on the counter
whiskey dick. though we did manage to break my closet door and flood the bathroom.
I did the walk of shame in nothing but a sleeping bag and now I'm on my way to pick up plan B. Let's not make a habit of this.
Sounds like a good New Years
Locals got pissed I was talking to the barmaid. Tried to tell me that they keep all the good beer at "a Soho walkup" Google saved me
Thanks for launching me off you reverse cowgirl. I think I chipped a tooth.
I feel horrible. I brought her to your house like a late night pizza delivery and dropped her off.
A boy in some branch of the military kissed me I think I'm going through an American sniper phase
she used her teeth again, but this time it was out of love
I don't know if the fact that I carry lube in my purse means I'm living life right or I'm doing it wrong..
He loves blowjobs.. were meant for each other.
Randomize
