just walked into the room and her sister said loudly, "do him, or I will."
Sitting next to a girl in the computer cluster who just googled syphilis symtoms, started crying & got up and left. My life suddenly seems better.
I just put up a picture on my dorm room wall of that ginger you hooked up with to remind myself that everyone makes mistakes
my boss told me he would look for my wallet when he went back to the strip club tonight.
If you're not washing nut sweat off of your forehead this morning I'm disappointed in you
I'm having Vietnam flashbacks. This Kid I hooked up with is speaking in class and I keep experiencing the terror.
your sister totally cock blocked me last night don't even think about inviting her to taco night
Her family was right next to mine during christmas eve mass. Between the terrifying glares and her trying to set my sleeve on fire during the candle part I am VERY sure she knows im fucking her ex...
don't care how drunk i am. my dick was like "nope, not doing it, you can't make me and i was like oh yes i can"
the 5 D's of Dodgeball literally just saved my life
Make sure you plan your visit for October. That's ACL festival, it's like every Bro in the country converges on Austin. My vagina wants to go hunting.
she was puking nonstop out of the car window in the rain during our hour long drive back, we got lot of honks
Jesus Christ. How the fuck do you not tell someone that your wife can see on the phone bill who you text and how many times ?
Not sure but if it exists I will find it and I will fill my face with it
You have the perkiest tits in all of North America. You're fine.
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