My 40 year old neighbors are throwing a party for their eight year old niece's birthday. It's 1am and they're still partying hard. Harder than me. It's Saturday. Just say it, I'm a disgrace to the generation.
This show inspires me to have sex in space
I might not be able to enter cuba but that doesn't mean that a cuban can't enter me
I love him. He's like the father I never had that I kind of want to fuck.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I JUST SAW A SIGN LANGUAGE CATFIGHT
It's like a bag of dicks covered in taint sweat pounding a pregnant baby walrus.
My asshole is basically a geyser at this point. Minus the excitement. Plus blood.
You said you couldn't look at me because you would have to take off your sunglasses but you can't because they're the "guides to your eyes".
Shhhh less advice, more soothing words and dirty phrases
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's a baby in the strip club. I say again: THERE'S A BABY IN THE STRIP CLUB
6 more days and it'll be a year since i slept with him and never went home
Hey, I left a taco in your dishwasher.
Thanks for the reference. If your boss hires me, I'll buy you a drink.
If my boss hires you, I'm going to need it.
I enjoy the company of your penis
If he brings home bacon, dont let him leave. Dont screw this one up. this may be our last chance.
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