why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
I'm in a strip club that reminds me of a crack house from the 80's.
he just asked if i would like him to change his diet so his jizz tastes better. keeper? i think so.
i'll never see her again. i cant remember her last name. this is like cinderella except prince charming drank too much jameson and couldnt save a phone number properly
This is drunk me apologizing to sober me in advance.. I am sprry about you're trashed house. Mom an dad will be home by 5 so get up and clean. P.s. Mike is in the closet passed out.
Idk how she did it. Either she watches freakier porn than I do, or I really need to go get tested.
so i had a dream that andrew cuomo ate me out. guess who i'm voting for?
Some mysterious chinese delivery man dropped off 2 free egg rolls. Clutch
You kept yelling in my face " YOU'RE GONNA HAVE TO SUCK A DICK TONIGHT!"
Uh yeah can we get an age of consent check on Dave's penis?
Age of consent, Dave's penis. Thank you...
did you see me getting spanked by that lady cop who was a guy?
Also, if asking a guy to come over and watch curling with you doesn't scream let's fuck then idk what does
I've never been so excited to have my ass in so much pain.
You were more fun when you didn't have morals.
Donald Trump looks like someone photoshopped hair onto a dick pic.
Randomize
