I think my mom's writing a book called how to fuck with your kids when you know they're high
we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
go home
There is so much to learn about oneself from autofill.
man, work is way more interesting with these acid flashbacks.
i need to buy one of the child leashes to wear at mardi gras or else im never making it out alive
I don't know. I was also picked up by the doormen and held over the bar so I could do an upside down shot out of a bartenders tits.
THE MIME IS MIMING TO BUST A MOVE KARAOKE. ALL MIME-RELATED EVENTS DESERVE CAPS LOCK
This is why i like single justin better. my only regret is not being present for more of his short life. may he rest in peace
you peed off the balcony at your sisters and asked someone below to catch it with a cup
Even dream me is a champ at smoking weed
He sent me a recycled dick pic! He could at least use one without sunlight in it, considering it's 10pm
I was angry that a college kid had a new Audi
so I peed on it
He called me Kitten either just because or he figured out my old s&m life. Either way huge turn on.
Please god tell me you aren't pregaming your date alone.
seriously i don't trust him. he fed me a hot dog out of a crock pot and gave me moonshine dashed jager bombs.
Randomize
