do you know mcdonalds refuses to give out large cups of water now? you have to buy a bottle or they give you a small cup. No exceptions.
RUDE.
I said FINE, then I'd like 7 small waters and 2 of those nifty carrying cases to carry about my h2o.
outsmarted mickey deeeees
just went onto Yahoo and the featured article had a picture of one of the Jonas brothers. last two times the featured article was a celebrity's face the headline was "Michael Jackson is Dead" and "Pitchman Billy Mays is Dead" so naturally I got a little excited. Turns out he's just engaged. Who gives a fuck.
Sorry about teling your dad i'd have sex with him last night in front of your mom while i was drunk
I feel like i'm in "To Catch a Predator - The Musical"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just uploaded three hundred pictures and you had your shirt off in two hundred and ninety of them
the remaining ten - you weren't in
Dating a girl 4 years younger than you is like living in a Taylor Swift song...
you used progresso chicken soup as a mixer last night
lets make a pact to never make a pregnancy pact
nothing like baby laughter to ruin a masturbation moment
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't talk about his dick. That's mine. There's a copyright on it. Use with permission
He's dressed as a power ranger handing out cocaine
Some fat latino guy has these 2 fat white moms making out with each other on the dance floor
Listen I took a family sized bottle of merlot to the face last night and there's an svu marathon on. Give me some time please.
Your uterus is safe from my father's misconstrued prophecies.
No joke. There's a picture of the priest I made out with on my parents' refrigerator.
Randomize