That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
My cat puked at the same time as me. Makes me feel better about myself, except he can stand and I can't.
By getting ready I mean putting baby powder in my hair and possibly changing my pajamas to another pair of pajamas
I just want you to know I tipped the cab driver $10 last night because I felt bad that he didn't have healthcare.
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It hit me after I slept with his best friends and brother, that maybe I took it a bit far
About to trim my pubes so if you decide to walk in, viewer discretion is advised.
No. I want him to marry me so we can spend our lives together. I also want a to-scale model of his genitals to mount above my fireplace
Seriously, do normal people actually get work done being this hungover? No wonder the economy's in the shitter
She is the absolute last thing I would want to screw. Honestly. Fellating a porcupine. Higher on the list.
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Do not ever get that redhead chem major high. Gave her a magic brownie and she sat in a corner and literally cried about organic chem. Never again.
She deliberately backed into the homewrecker's whoremobile and yelled ""FOR SPARTA!"
Just so you know in the morning, yes you did send your bartender a snap of your boobs. No I didn't try to stop you because you used sound logic for doing so.
Based on the conversation I'm going to assume you didn't close the deal.
It started going awry when I fell through a roof.
gonna stay in tonight
and im a platypus. shotgun a beer and get your dick to this party. ive got some hot friends visiting
I'm not big on drama but you need to put your pants on and leave.
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