dude chill. it wont be anything like your seventh grade birthday party.
So what if i'm late to spanish tomorrow. who the hell cares. i don't even speak spanish.
Im so hungover that my 6 year old cousine made me aspirine and coffee out of playdoh...
Her facebook status is 'PERCS ON DECKKK~' which is probably why she still lives with her parents.
We totally just fucked in a closet. These vacations with his family are causing creativity I never thought I had.
Just ordered a clown who does balloon animals. No backing out now.
I mostly enjoyed dancing with him because his boner was scratching my bug bites.
he paid for dinner at the eiffel tower. drinks at a bar on the champs elysees. gave me a motorcycle ride back to his house, got us heineken and then took me to park overlooking paris. where he ate me out on a park bench. still have doubts about the french?
as of this morning I have officially vommed on the highways of 6 different countries. It's a proud moment.
I would have screamed and cried and bled and shit and then died. Fuck that guy.
My body is telling me there was tequila. My pictures say it was Jeff's fault
I may or may not have tried to give myself a lobotomy
New holiday tradition. Eat all the Xanax in the am, then wake up later after festivities and eat all the leftovers
We were trying to organize all the customers to hold a window pickle race. as of 10:37 pm last night we are no longer allowed in our McDonalds.
She was a cheerleader in college and President of her sorority and now she’s a sales rep for a pharmaceutical corporation. “High maintenance hot” doesn’t even begin to explain it
But dear lord is it worth it
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