Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
During sex she told me I could do anything I wanted to her. You remember that toy lightsaber we bought at Wal Mart?
we just did breakfast shots, I have a black eye and savage garden is on . Best weekend ever
They're like penises that have been put in a blender.
I took both his daughters virginities. There's no way he won't give me a job
I found a big gulp cup full of vomit in my freezer, are you behind this?
Ladies, we have an appointment at David's Bridal aurora this coming Sunday at 3pm. And an appointment at where ever tequila is served at noon.
I feel like we had some profound moment last night, but I can't really recall much past your ass turning up the volume on the radio.
Well, I'm getting my ex-boyfriend to get me a z pack to cure the chlamydia I got from my married fuck buddy so that I can fuck one of my students.
She said she wants to move in with me. Time to black out and act as if we never had this conversation.
How are you a firefighter? People actually trust you with their lives??
We could get her a gift basket of Xanax l
There are horrible decisions in life and then there are tequila flavored moonshine decisions
I don't need romance, I need cheese sticks
How did I get the fat lip, while puking I may or may not have sneezed... Wacking my face into the toilet bowl...
You can accomplish quite a bit with a can do attitude and a well placed ice cube.
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