Sometimes I wonder if my friend studies mystic Christian theology because he's afraid to come out of the closet. Evidently, it's okay to talk about God coming inside you, but not to say the same about dudes.
yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
We all know the best way to start a relationship is greeting while at least one of you are intoxicated, dual facebook stalking, and a two week long game of 20 questions via texts to 'really' get to know each other. In that order.
I wouldn't have it any other way. It's like a fairy tale!
I dont wanna date her. I just wanna be able to run a blacklight over her face and prove ownership.
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you two started sword fighting with 3 ft tall spruce trees you pulled out of planters
Well, that's a 3 inch weight lifted off of my vagina
So I saw the nuva ring just lying on the counter at Planned Parenthood...did u know it's just a ring? I could go to the Dollar tree buy a plastic bracelet and shove it up there instead.
You do that. Then go have lots of unprotected with your harem of booty calls and see how that works out for you.
She was to tired for head so she opted for a footjob with poor results. I dont want to talk about it
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
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I have to go buy generic plan b after work. I don't even leave for the new semester for another 11 days. I think I just leveled up in sluttiness
Hey sorry for calling you so much last night. I mixed your number with the pizza guys, and he was running late
You have a husband. I have a bag full of electronics. This, is the single life.
The lady at the liquor store in my hometown just gave ran around the corner and gave me a hug when I came back from being gone for a couple months. My life is complete.
um care to explain the stolen chinchila under greg's bed..i'd be fine with it if it wasnt chewing up the stash
He woke up and decided to go for a swim in the lake... At about 3am... With his dogs
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