Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
I'm still reeling over the fact that you beat us all at Risk while you were flat on your ass drunk and falling asleep on South America.
They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
The last thing i remember is saying breakfast beer and carrying the keg to my room and locking the door.
the kid throwing up and laying face down on the deck just asked ME if I'M okay...
Grandma is giving me marriage advice again. On the plus side, she thinks I'm straight now.
I have a cat, a bottle of wine, and a Brazilian man. I need to catch you up on my life
I feel like our lives always have been and always will be a never ending drunken rampage full of pregnancy scares and lost brain cells
He may not be fully over his current wife yet. But wait until I show him my tits in his office at the end of the day tonight.
Major life highlight, she said my dick taste like coffee.
5 minutes Isn't even long enough to bring me even close to an orgasm. How selfish. Think about baseball and fuck me you idiot.
Christ I forgot how flexible you need to be for a decent sext pic. Jesus.
And to be fair, I think we all suspect that forbidden sex with an outlaw biker might be worth it.
Upstairs definitely just had sex while I wrote you love poetry. That was a fun experience 🤷🏻♀️
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