You're my little dorito
feel weird hangin out with you now that i've eaten your sister out
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
Apparently one comment in my womens studies class cockblocks yourself for an entire semester.
We should bet how many people are going to get alcohol poisoning next weekend and whoever wins gets a free Starbucks.
Im walking to an ob gyn practice session right now. Literally have to get face first in a middleaged vagina in 10 min.
ASS. GYMANSTICS. OLYMPICS. NOW!!!
Yup. Can I borrow your penis decanter for my Xmas party on Saturday
Walked in the bathroom at work and my boss was taking a shit with the stall wide open and responded "oh yeah, I forgot you never have been to prison "
I woke up with what appeared to be LSD in my pocket. Know anything about this?
Well I'm back. Could you fill me in on what I missed?
You don't want to know. Trust me.
Well we found Mark's missing underwear. They're pinned up on Mike's trophy wall.
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
i feel like i got punched in the face....
you did....
And my butt misses you like the deserts miss the rain.
Randomize
