if i could have babies with my dog i totally would cause i know thay would be fucking hott babies.
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
can someone explain to me why i woke up under a twister sheet
does drinking everclear count as brushing your teeth? because i think they are sterilized
They upped the price of Plan B! Rite-aid is going to be the reason I have illegitimate kids.
I doubt the Taliban would support fake nipples.
Im about to have a threesome, Ill pay you twenty bucks to go clean my room. Just throw it all in the closet.
Could be my worst decision since the whole 'third degree burn' fiasco.
Did you sleep with Connor? And who undressed me? There's a picture of two guys peeing out my bedroom window. What happened?
What can I say? I like my food like I like my women, not entirely fucked by our contemporary world.
I'm never waking up next to someone after sex again. It's alllll downhill from there.
Well I'm currently debating between getting toilet paper or getting my eyebrows waxed so... There's that
Girl, we were harassing people from the top of a building. I don't know how I got down, but I'm eating chocolate cake in my kitchen. Sall good yo.
Or is it distressingly heterosexual?
Fuck your bullshit loser kid and his gluten allergy.
Randomize
