i walked into his room and he was eskimo kissing his weed..
he just spelled fiance, "pheancie". I dont think he's ready to get married.
whatever it's my dick and i'll put it wherever i want
I'm sick of being broke. I had vicodin and frosting for lunch.
We need more drag queens in our life I've decided
I was like kind of drunk but mostly just very enthusiastic about beyonce
...there was a woman in the stall next to me in the Walmart bathroom having a massive bowl movement and whispering "I'm sorry" over and over
The secret to finals week is to have an orgasm for every point you need on the test before you take it.
The dick lei will go down in squad history
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
I don't think I used nearly enough fucks in my reply to convey the level of fuck him.
There's nothing classy about a pregnant girl at a frat party...remember that.
It's taking all of my will power not to chug this margarita. This must be the life of an adult...
Slept with a member of the band last night, found out today after extensive stalking he’s engaged. Pro tip: don’t research one night stands.
I SHOULD BE TERRIFIED OF HIS DRAGON DICK.
Randomize
