Its sad we have to plan out fun a month in advance. 30 sucks.
You realize we can hear you jacking off in your room, right?
I like it rough
I love online classes. Spent the last part of my lecture taking apart a teabag and filling it with weed.
She bit a glass in half.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
do you think theyll let us bring mariachis to the strip club?
how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
Fucked Zombie Jesus at a Halloween party. I need Plan B before I give birth to the Antichrist.
Just got a blow job while taking my online quiz. How is life in the dorms treating you?
I pulled some girls weeve trying to pull the stop cord on the bus
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Brightest idea yet: lets drink enough at ladies-drink-free nights to make up for the cost of tampons. Breaking even on having vaginas!
Can I even tell you how badly I want a day that is just on and off napping and sex with intermittent snack breaks? Because I want that day very badly.
I have never seen a more amazing text message in my entire life.
Treating myself to outback while reading the entire manual that comes with my birth control in public. Is this what single has come to?
Apparently, acid is a good substitute for cash if you don't have any! Who knew?
I wish I had a Tina from Bob's Burgers in real life. She would be the best wingman.
I know he's married but I don't know how else to show sympathy! Nudes are my only emotional currency.
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