I think scott just propositioned me for sex
Whenever ur ready we need breakfast and a psychic.
Y'know, without the cops, it would've just been us daydrinking,
gettin drunk isnt as much fun when i can use my own id for it
its totally unfair that im just as ill-prepared as a 16 year old but there's no tv show for 25 and pregnant.
i feel like verizon should give a sexter of the month award
So how many licks to the face does it take to get kicked out of the bar?
We found her on a strangers doorstep chanting "I know someone will let me in" it took 2 of us to drag her to the car.
I knew no one else would have gone along with it since it's morally wrong and probably illegal. You said, "Yes. And let's add fireworks."
Blood work from physical was all good, apparently heavy alcohol use agrees with me
I mean it's a good blow job, but it's not worth the four hour round trip.
Everytime I try to keep track of the amount of people I slept with I always forget about that guy I met on the dc metro, where I woke up to him organizing his Special K and Molly and I was covered in sleeping cats.
And to be fair, I think we all suspect that forbidden sex with an outlaw biker might be worth it.
As of right now, my vibrator and a bag of snickers share the same drawer
I’m torn. She’s crazy - like legitimately “Wear your skin as a suit” crazy. But her blow jobs and dirty talk are Pornhub quality!
Randomize
