i didn't know you could wash puke off of bras with a dishwasher.
my elementary bus driver served me drinks last night. He hooked me up
It's sad that he has such a beautiful cock and doesn't know what to do with it.
Maybe I need a light up heart over my vagina like Christina aguilera to get the point across
literally the only thing you kept saying was "i wish i had a beer keg vending machine that accepted hugs as payment" and everytime you said it you rubbed the urn her grandmother's remains were in
You held your own hair and threw up into a red cup...I think they were more amazed than upset.
Yeah someone just put a trash bag that says "use protection" on the snow penis
Had sex and ran 2.8 miles all before 7:30am. This is going to be a very productive Monday.
if i ever get hit by a car or something and become paralyzed promise me youll still be here to hand feed me shots and light my bowls please
omg this is getting ridiculous. nobody's vagina should ever be this neglected.
The feeling are messing with the penis
Sex with him is like pizza, it can be shitty but its stillll pizza.....
GET ME OUT OF HERE THE DOCTOR KNOWS HE IS JUDGING ME I DEMAND A PRISON BREAK
I just tried to brush my hair with a can opener. Who gave you that brownie
I went in for a high five.. He went in for a kiss.. Today is a good day
Randomize
