I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
having to delete all your hookups stored in your phone as first name followed by frat/bar after they've graduated is such a bittersweet feeling
I just realized there's an entire generation of children that will never know Alex Trebek had a mustache... Sad.
I hurt. I blacked out in a onesie. Reevaluation needs to happen.
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You flooded my bathroom while trying to construct a hot tub. All three of you were completely naked.
it was all good until he screamed "for fraaannnceee" on his last thrust
I just made an agreement with this milf to shoot her daughters wedding in exchange for blow jobs. Going pro was the best choice I ever made.
hey now, it was 6 bucks for 5 shots. you would have lost your panties too.
We were talking when all of a sudden she reach and started squeezing my dick and goes "nice." and then just kept the conversation going like nothing happened.
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I don't think it's food poisoning, I think it's cause you cooked it over burning styrofoam
My eczema on my back is flaring up so he rubbed coconut oil on it while we were boning down. If that's not a picture of 8 years married I dunno what is.
Ugh... The hoe gods giveth and the hoe gods taketh away.
you ate an entire watermelon by using a CD as a spoon, then proceeded to chuck the leftovers at some dudes car...
I'm reading fall out boy fanfic. What has my life come to.
Hi I love you will you be up for a while!
That exclamation point was a drunk decision
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