I think I'm going to start texting all the people that don't want to talk to me
do you have any idea why i woke up naked spooning my toaster?
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
Are we responsible for the snowmen doing it doggy-style in my front yard?
I'm currently bartering with this guy so I can fuck his bi girlfriend. We're at 5 pizzas and he gets to watch us make-out.
Oh and I found some acid for the drive back to school, productive day
We left the bar in 2 bicycle cabs. It cost thirty bucks and they took us to the wrong hotel. When we finally made it to the right one we ended up in a room with three randos from alaska. Jammed out with them for like an hour. Those inuits are good guitar players
I wrote my name on his balls in sharpie. In the homosexual world that's like a diamond ring. Shits permanent.
Just made a Xanax and ginger ale smoothie. Oh Thursday you are good to me..
I just threw in a dip with a guy that superglued his fake tooth back in today. My life is complete.
I last recall trying to play piano and asking justin for drugs. I would like to think I then gracefully laid down on the couch and shut my eyes like a sleeping kitten.
He still texted me and invited me over a day later so I guess I'm the lovable kind of psycho
Is it ironic that our divorce court is a block from where we had our reception? Or is it just sad? Alanis has confused my understanding of irony.
dude new orleans is fucking wild these two guys just performed dueling banjos except they were actually fighting with the banjos
I think we have some hyper-understanding of each other when drunk, because looking back at our text convo from last night, they were literally just jumbled letters.
Randomize
