very cute, but more "I wanna put you in my pocket and keep you as a pet" and less "please bang me" type of cute.
So currently I have a block of cheese duct taped to my air conditioner in lieu of a fridge.
I basically get to watch her life fall apart via tumblr updates
Last thing I remember is beer bonging sangria. Dear God.
I don't mean to complain but you could have done a better job of keeping me alive last night
Oh hey. I left my beer there. Beer is more important than my pride. I want to pick that up.
Go forth my little lesbian, get your gayme on
You got a write up and a first aid award all in the same night. The don was impressed!
i can trust myself, just not when im drunk. and drinking is my favorite pastime
Wet should excavate the hamsters out of the front yard n give them a proper burial.
Wanna see if we can get cut off at bdubs again? The same hipster manager that is younger than us is working again
someday i'll meet a man and who loves me as much as i love getting drunk and starting fires
sober me doesnt really want him anymore, but when drunk me takes over, she might want him, and god only knows the shit that might happen with drunk me.
Whatever douche. I sucked the dick that made you. I. Win.
it was like where's waldo, only the stakes were much higher.
Randomize
