The elaphant ear plant popped a new leaf ! Wahoo !
Through a series of unfortunate circumstances, I think I just sprayed lime juice on my vagina.
I can actually hear my brain cells scream as they die when she speaks.
Is moral bankruptcy something you need to file for?
you cant just puke in an arbys and not order food. thatd be rude.
A guy wearing a hard hat while floating the river. It's the most responsible drinking we saw all day.
we convincced her parents we were only wasted meanwhile theire faces were morphing into one and i swear there was a reindeer in the background
I dont know about you but I'm not getting out of bed this summer for anything but food or sex
thats why a responsible adult always keeps some facial hair just in case they need to shave a hulk hogan mustache for midget wrestling...
you puked in the bathtub and said "let them pee"
we had break-up sex in a port-a-potty. how do you think it went?!
Please collect your boy friend. He semi-passed out on the couch and trying to grab bums as people walk by. Anyone's bum, he's not choosy.
I'm sure we could go all project runway on our diapers and create some flattering absorbent thongs. We could do it on the Boat. Call it project rumway.
And by not handle it I mean it makes me want to sit on his face
He told me he felt the only proper thing to do was fuck me to the top of the corporate ladder
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