Im drinkin out of a coconut! I think im gonna dip my balls in it!
The streak lives on, still havent been to Towson without throwing up
I took the precaution of putting my macbook the one place in the dorm there is no way i can piss on it... the toilet
Jail is not for me. They portion control your meals and I don't really like that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sangria Sundays can't keep happening. Even my second grade students know I'm hungover. Benji even gave me his oreos its that bad
Did you catch one of my beer pong balls in your cleavage or was that a dream?
Yea... The gym isn't gunna happen today... When I was drunk last night I tried to prove I could front flip off the wheel cover of a semi... I fucked up my shoulder pretty bad... It was more of a roll
I DESERVE A BEADED TATTOOED MAN I'VE WANTED ONE FOR SO LONG
BEARDED TATTOOED MEN ARE PEOPLE AND NOT THINGS TO BE GIVEN FREELY
I responded with "neat-o burrito" to his SEXT...he tried so hard and I just panicked.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input
Can we just get drunk and watch the Birdcage please I have no tolerance for straight men today
for not the first time in my life, my clothes are covered in piss and i'm standing in line waiting to buy pedialyte at a convenience store
Goddamn it. Hes got me addicted to his penis
My bed smells like the plague
How's the party?
I'm watching two people get flogged. Sothere's that.
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