Dude i fell asleep inside of her
thats awesome
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
Ended up at a lesbian bar and almost got stabbed in the eye with a dart. Weirdest bachelor party ever.
then she kicked a hole in her own door and the next thing you know, brian's walking up to her room with power tools. in no condition to use them
Chick in class has 69 tattooed on the back of her neck. Target acquired.
I will be your sherpa up the mountain of gayness
Tornado booty call.. dedication
I have a friend that keeps saying he wants to go bear hunting. Thought I would say just walk down church street at night. What intersection is it?
cocks speak louder than words, as they say
Nobody says that.
Every single person in NY is either baking, drinking, or photographing their cat. Reporting live from Instagram.
You can't just take out your bong for hits in public places... That's what pipes are for. You've got to be stealthier.
No, it's okay because this is the city of trees.
YOU'VE ALREADY BEEN BUSTED MORE THAN ONCE. THAT'S NOT A VALID EXCUSE FOR BONG HITS IN COFFEE GARDEN
He literally wrote out a schedule. On it, there's a taco break, and a spot where I start crying.
Well, if it makes you feel any better I'll be drinking tequila and doing lines on Halloween. Just like old days.
Make a note to pack something that won't catch shell casings in your cleavage
I’m a go ahead and fuck down ATL. So when I leave in January I’ll have no regrets.
Randomize
