quit re-tweeting John McCain's tweets
I wish that guy wasn't missing teeth
how drunk are you?
What does that even mean anymore?
I mean I had a leg brace. It would have been irresponsible for me to be on top.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All i remember before i blacked out is you pointing to a random chick and telling me to bang her for America.
i just missed the spain goal because i was puking in the bathroom. damn you open bar.
Hey. Whatever time u wake up let me know Ur alive. I need my vegas partner... I don't think they let u take corpses on a plane.
Shame tastes like burnetts and latex
True life. I have to get a nose job due to a deviated septum from blowing coke. Thank you college.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No, I don't just love you because you have big boobs. I just wouldn't visit as often.
Good news: I actually puked in my bathroom, the vomit from the living room was actually from someone else.
That's horrible but hilarious
I'm going to miss college.
You kept running up to married couples, taking their pictures and begging for them not to get divorced
You added his wife on Facebook?! You're horrible at this mistress thing
I think I was just motorboated by a 4-year old girl.
thank you for the vibrator recommendation, i've come six times today and it's only noon
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