I am one bad relationship away from having 30 cats.
walking in back of a girl wearing booty shorts, a halter and a bracelet that says trainwreck. I don't get it. The first day of nice weather and all the whores come out, are they like hibernating bears or something?
Don't you ever say "drinking at 2" as if it's a bad thing again. I'm asking you as a friend here.
Is moral bankruptcy something you need to file for?
21 Ladies Confess The Grossest Things They Do When No One’s Around
if the best thing you can say about him is "he probably wont kill me" you may want to rethink hanging out with him
I fed the cats at 7 am, made her eggs, gave her oral, and now I'm helping her clean and baking her brownies. Cosmos got nothing on me.
Are taco bell cups microwave safe? I can't make that judgement right now
I'm just planning on experiencing Disney as adult style as it gets. Drinking bloody mary's at dawn and telling all the kids waiting in lines how badly their future sucks and that Santa isn't real.
never underestimate the power of walking into a bar alone in uv cat makeup.. took home a seven foot man
23 Tweets I Thought Were Really Funny When I Was Drunk Yesterday
Well i think matt shit his pants so ill mark that as a W
I need a light and a towel. ive got cum in places ive never had cum before.
It's shark week go big or go home
You gotta come over now. He is eating cupcakes while they are still in the foil.
She flashed us last time and pissed all over the floor this time. I'm scared to invite her back.
I woke up and found that i was using my computer as a pillow. i had 53 pages of random letters on Microsoft word
Randomize
