i told him i was gay. he said that gay guys are supposed to be pretty.
its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
I got "discovered a new religion high" last night
doing lines of blow through a tampon applicator in the study lounge at 7am so i can finish an italian composition that was due a week and a half ago...such a good student.
Here’s Everything Coming To Netflix This July
I'm not a creep or anything, just a lost soul looking for a good lay
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
I'm currently witnessing my drunk neighbor attempting to fold laundry on his front lawn. I think he's trying to spell out HELP.
omg i hate the new neighbors. why cant a bitch just be hungover in peace on a wednesday morning.
Stop inviting me to your birth control calender reminders...my job is to test its effectiveness, not know its schedule
19 Of The Creepiest (Most Inexplicable) Things People Experienced
Which one of you fuckers thought itd be funny to see if the kitchen table can float.
I am no longer drunk enough to crave tostitos
And that was the night we had mind-blowing sex with the score from Raiders of the Lost Ark blaring on vinyl in the background...
I would date him. For 1 month. Just so I could say I was a trap queen for 1 month.
He's actually really cute and seems like a good guy. And given that he likes lots of drugs, he could come in handy.
I'm to childless and to single to be asking myself why I'm so sticky