I judge my drunkenness on my brickbreaker playing skills. I'm winning. Suck it.
I have no idea what her name is. I only remember putting my dick between her ass cheeks.
There is a mermaid on oprah and she looks nothin like ariel
Made out with me girlfriend while she was peeing. all time high, or all time low?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Canada just beat USA, the sad part they still need us to make money so who really won
We removed her tutu and her cape, so there's no risk of her strangling herself.
He was with one girl when I went to bed, wad with another when I woke up and now he just told me he was with a 3rd in-between last night and this morning. Jesus Christ.
I just want you to know that I'm, like, 45% hard right now.
You got a write up and a first aid award all in the same night. The don was impressed!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't know what to do with my life other than going on Reddit and watching porn.
my roommate was being a bitch so I changed my Netflix password on her. 21st century slap in the face ladies and gentleman
Can't tell if it's the drugs or science magic, but I *THINK* that mouse just turned into a squirrel.
If you can throw 105 mph it’s mandatory that you’re hung.
You know what i hate? I hate when the ppl you drunkenly made out with actually want to talk to you sober. It just doesn't work that way sir.
I feel like I have the I just lost my virginity face and everyone at the grocery store knows it.
Randomize