go do what you do best...puke behind churches
The trick is to not slur when purchasing the condoms at 3am
My sister got her picture in the pub crawl section of the paper today and my dad said to me "why can't you be more like her?"
I know you're trying to keep the moaning to a minimum but the banging on the wall is totally giving you away
I'm really not interested in hearing from him. Unless there is casual sex involved
The birthday girl is bringing her own barf bucket, it is going to be a good weekend.
Never visiting again. You guys drink like immortals
How did it go last night?
Woke up head half shaved and a burrito? So good and bad?
Having a man strip on demand was an awesome way to start birthday. What more could a girl ask for? U the best!
This morning I found four opened yet full beers on my desk and my towel rack pulled off the wall and in bed with me
I either forgot underwear this morning or lost them at work and I seriously don't know which.
I'm like a hairless cat ready to be ravished
Sitting in a music store. There is a 40 something year old guy in a track suit, with a boner, and playing the ukelelie quite intensely.
thanks for thinking of me.
Only I would get an underage 24 hours before turning 21.
I accidentally just texted my dad asking if he wants to do shrooms with me. Do I leave the city now or...
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