Who would have guessed that on my moms birthday she'd have sex with the door open. :(
It's been 5 months since I last wore a condom.
Not including when spray tanning
Soo time for a life change, my 6 yr old sister made my gf a puke bucket for her birthday
Well yes but because of that incident i now salute to truck drivers
I inspected his penis with a mini flashlight to check for visible stds...he was clean
I caught him with his head in the spinach bag this morning. He was laughing demonically saying, "i love spinach, yes I do."
I dont even remember coming home... All my stuff is strewn randomly around my apartment... And I woke up at 5 sitting propped up in my bed with just my arm in a shirt
I'm gonna cougar town the shit out of that prom.
Well once I told her I had a girlfriend she actually got more aggressive. Then Danielle called me and she saw the pic of the two of us on my phone and immediately said "can my caller I'd pic be me sitting on your face" wtf?
Boss out of town. Had 2 beers for lunch, a long walk and a bowl...and then in he comes. Blamed obvious intoxication on my pain meds. Back at the bar. This is one of those bad judgement days.
My wife climbed on top of me, fucked my brains out, and gave me money from the ATM. I'm living the dream.
You have better ratings than Crest. Only 4/5 dentists recommend it. You have 8/9 recommendation for your blowjob skills.
Oh you know, the usual. We had a good date, I took her back home, she took off my pants, laughed, and left.
Be happy for me... Or horny... Or be a really good friend and feel what I want you to feel. Jealousy
I would wear his ballsack as a hat if he asked me to
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