dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
i dont know whats so great about being respectable.
dude i feel like shit
well u did eat a lot of play-doh
i just picked a peanut m&m up off the floor. with my toes. and then proceeded to eat it.
I mean we havent seen each other since december and then bam its cinco de mayo and were having sex under a life guard tower taking tequila shots between each position. no big deal
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
Hurricane Earl: Get Blown party at my house friday! Byob: bring your own bitch/booze. Must have 80s blown hair style, kazoo/noise maker (vuvuzelas/airhorns are allowed), and/or bubble wands. \n
Why am I even shocked you're doing this....
I have fiberglass splinters all over my hands and woke up with a sign that says PUMPKINS in my room.
Expect nothing less than me teaching them how to do shots and put condoms on
He's texting from midnight mass asking for nude pics. Baby Jesus is spinning in his manger as we speak
My vagina: 1 Male stubborness: 0
He's so sweet...I can't see him enjoying that I got injured during sex.
We almost drove away from the bar with a British stranger in our trunk...
You shouted "my financial aid just came in, who wants a shot?!" Half the bar followed
I’ve looked at so many mouse vaginas in the past week
Randomize
