The ticket read "Found nude in a tree"
I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
don't wear any deodorant. we have to do everything we can to sabotage this wedding
it's a girl!!
That's great, I look forward to meeting her in 18 years
I know it's not standard practice to meet the couple you donate to, but i'm curious as to what kind of people saw my picture and said, we want that girl's eggs
I think my cats understand what porn is. And it's all my fault.
Dude shes not that fat. Plus, last night I probably would've done it too.
I need a burrito and a hug.
The last thing I remember was riding in a grocery cart with two strangers while a cop pushed us
I will never look at a penis the same again. After that I will appreciate them so much more than I do. Makes me wanna kiss yours just for being pretty
But seriously I might need help getting spray paint off of my body.... But don't worry about the penis I scrubbed him already
Pretty sure the waitress here is concerned about well being bc I've been here drinking by myself for 3 hours. If only I could show here FB so she'd know I'm not alone...
Dilemma. I'm out of wine and I can't put on clothes to go to the liquor store bc I just got spray tanned. If this isnt white girl problems I don't know what is.
I got pull-out-my-nuvaring-drunk last night.
The Adderall says yes, but my body says no.
Randomize
