We got so high yesterday we tried watching soccer
Hey Operation Dumbo Drop... FYI, when you select your date this evening, our doorway is 3'x7'
i find it simply astounding you spelled drunken wrong but pterodactyl right
They asked if I was about to puke and my response was to laugh and suddenly throw up. Continuing my asshole streak I kept laughing while still vomiting.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Someone just took a shot from my crotch. I should not have to drive home
That is the best grammar in a dirty text ever. Excellent use of the semi-colon. And yes; I am hard.
I've liked him since I puked on him on my birthday so I want it to be special.
All I remember is waking up with 3 penises pointed at my face. I also remember enjoying that a lot. And then I threw up in their shower.
I feel like my nipples were chewed on by alligators.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She was giving me head while we were in my tree house, my mom then came out to let the dog out so she stopped so I would stop groaning, was it good? You tell me
Now that makes it sound like you had sex with a guy in batman costume and you never took the mask off so you can't 100 percent be sure.
Letting Freddy Krueger eat me out = HAPPY HALLOWEEN TO ME!!!
I feel like I'm pretty optimistic for a girl that might be pregnant.
It's finals week and I'm halfway done with this bag of wine and don't plan on stopping. Say goodbye to my GPA
Question: When you have the names of 4 guys tattoo'd on you, how do you make the 5th one real special?
Randomize