Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(913): View more from Kansas

high. he's playing 'oops i did it again' on the ukelele. is this real life?

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(215): View more from Pennsylvania

So, do you know where my left shoe is? I mean, we were at a few places last night, and I called them. No luck for me.

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(406): View more from Montana

you kept looking at stripers and saying " Go to College"

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(402): View more from Nebraska

I want a calm night. Not one where I wake up to you topless and bloody.

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(504): View more from Louisiana

From what I can tell at a cursory glance, it seems that last night I fell asleep on string cheese and it melted into my bra.

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(208): View more from Idaho

My sugar daddy is a bigger asshole than i am. What's wrong here?

Fav 6 594 1073
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(813): View more from Florida

I am a woman. I need to be selective about the porn I stream on my phone. Who knows if my cell will ever get lost, who will see it and what they'd think otherwise. Keepin' it classy tampa.

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(973): View more from New Jersey

Stuck in the Minneapolis airport for 3 hours with an expense budget and a wine bar. This could get out of hand quickly.

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(419): View more from Ohio

You said, "I'll have this whole island inside of you by 6 AM. Just point out who you want and I'll make it happen."

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