This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
no one should ever give us hovercrafts
The bartender just started bringing me gin and tonic in a pint glass to save himself trips...
We're trying to leave but amy's hitting on the guy who mans the nacho cart
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's a really old guy here with a really young girl. I'm guessing he has to make choo choo train noises to get his dick in her mouth.
Listen, don't freak out when you walk out on me masturbating in front of my roommate. No homo. He just needs to be put to his place.
If it makes you feel any better, karma just served me up a big dose of fuck you.
Except if I'm having sex. In which case you're in the bed with us or out of the room. No halfsie participation.
That final makes me want to drink myself into the fetal position
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it frowned upon to bring a flask to the er?
I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
I heard drunk is the new sober. I heard me say that. To a cop. Can you come get me??
30 year old woman with braces and crocs came into the store today with her boyfriend. what am I doing wrong.
You know you've found a good drug dealer when he's willing to overnight mail to you in another state...
you never know when your going to find a surprise from me in your bed...it keeps you on your toes.
Randomize