all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl.
after we finished, she said she had been a backup performer for Cirque du Soleil. THAT flexible.
so when we were booking the hotel and plane tickets for vegas we reserved a chapel for someone, it's inevitable.
Walked into a liquor store bleeding. That kind of night.
I started to trust fall random people on the dance floor
I just scrubbed chocolate off the bathtub... You better have had a damn good birthday
Theres a picture of me with cut up clothes rolling in the policeman's lawn, I missed you, summer.
I almost had to get my pinky cut off. Wow I'm so happy. We won beer olympics so i didnt hahaha
Friendly reminder that on the walk home you tripped but instead of falling to the sidewalk, you tried to save it and ended up headbutting my ex-boyfriend in the balls. ILU.
This is what happens when wu tang raised you
It's not even close to Halloween but there is a girl in a nurses outfit. Twerk or twat.
I sewed up my pants, stole his girlfriends white shirt, and went to work hungover like a responsible adult.
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST.
Drunk. Send nudes. Just curious.
No one can touch me, I'm made of fruit.
Randomize
