i can't believe i had my finger in that
took shots out of a medicine cup. i can get used to college.
So... I'm really sorry I tried to sell you to random people in cars last night
Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
I just saw at least a dozen senior citizens on roller blades. way to drunk for this.
at this point every shot is just a haymaker to my liver
Well it was tamer than the 4th of july when I blew that guy I met walking home from the fireworks
Holy hangover, going dancing with family good idea, taking the last shot with the transvestite bar owner not so much...
You were outside cuddling a rock singing Bohemian Rhapsody.
WTF DUDE?
Stay calm. I'm sure there's a heterosexual explanation for this
I'm pretty sure I just need an IV drip of Plan B at this point...
Got dumped. Now accepting nominations for my extra Dave Mathews ticket. No xboyfriends. Must cast final votes by Monday. Good luck everyone
Its like I've been given a sexual blank check.
At this point, I'd date an ax murderer. So long as he doesn't cry all the time, have ED, or leave me with his unspayed cat. My list of requirements is becoming increasingly specific.
please tell me you're the one making all the weird noise in the yard..
Randomize
