Do you think they could tell I was high on that conf call?
I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
Sundays have taken on a whole new meaning when I'm not in bed with an excruciating hangover.
I swear to god he's a one man village people.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She gave me head because I gave her my pack of cigarettes...And you said quitting would be hard.
I can feel my liver begging me to stop.
I showed up to a booty-call in my onesie pajamas and rubber boots
this dude, we had a connection. he kept smiling at me. it's like he knew i was gonna facebook stalk the fuck out of him
I peed sitting down because I knew standing was a lost cause
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Lack of response to this text gains you a half hour of freedom before I initiate operations to conclude you are not, in fact, comatose. You requested no mercy.
You kept hiding under tables and grabbing people's legs and shouting SHARK ATTACK.
I was thrusting to the beat of Felix Navidad..
I really would enjoy sexual intercourse with you.
Most formal booty call EVER
Finally fucked my buddy's mom!! We are both ten years older and for her it really shows but i hit it!!
I expected my Sunday morning walk of shame dressed as a sexy Dorothy would get some scorn, but nobody seems to even care
That’s because it’s 2020. The slutty costume walk of shame is a refreshing reminder of a time when wearing masks and catching communicable diseases was a right of passage, not everyday for the foreseeable future.
Randomize