Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
Once again you get dinner and all I get is semen on my leg
i was so high i thought his mole came off and was flying around
I hid my booze in my old Sesame Street lunch box. Big Bird might be disappointed, but I feel Oscar the Grouch would approve.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I gave up my innocence when I let him cum in my spelling bee trophy
Why is Kyle using one of my nieces as a blunt object to provoke and attack my other niece?
She wants to fuck me. On a tennis court. In her tennis outfit. Is ring-shopping an acceptable 3rd date activity?
Come over. I'll eat you out and we'll make bacon.
best text I've received ever.
Watermelon juice. Makes everything better. Gin. Wine. EVERYTHING.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I do believe that seeing camel toe in leopard print pants at Walmart is the closest I will ever come to going on a safari
I may have just poured a honey apple beer onto a dried apple slice to rehydrate it. This is my day.
I'm having a funeral for my vibrator. Please be there. I need your dick for support.
I saw an episode of cops that had one of my ex husbands on it.
You told me that you would let her eat cake off of your ass, then fell asleep on the floor
just found the "let's take a picture before we do these roommates" before picture
thank god there was never an after picture.
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