Bea Arthur died! :(
What?
Big bird passed.
I Once took so much Ecstacy that I tried to hug a fire.
so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
she was screaming in french about how classy it was to be drinking wine. oh... she was drinking it out of the bottle. with a beer in her other hand while throwing up.
I just saw a girl make a shank with the underwire in her bra...
I've never seen a grown man cry so much after getting jerked off by a stripper. I say it's the best $600 he ever spent.
I can't wait for you to see these terrible photos I'm about to have taken with some stripper looking girls. I don't know what this photographer is thinking
Well I don't think you can suck his dick while he's making pizza. I think that goes against some health codes.
Also, I found out that my dad has the name of every boy that I've ever dated and their physical description, car type and tag number stored in his computer.
Apparently Angela went missing once and he says he learned were to look first and that it's best to have information on hand.
Ryan friended me on LinkedIn and it took everything in my power not to endorse him for sexual dysfunction as a skill.
I hate when pubes grow back. My mons is a warzone.
I'm going to target high, just in case I ask you where my paycheck went later
You hear the wildest shit in a Walmart bathroom.
I'm about to go get lunchables and alcohol. Take that adulthood
Our baby is creepy.
That's how we know it's ours. haha
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