McDonalds has hash browns for only a quarter!....how many u want?
All of them
they told me her nickname is "wizard sleeve"
pick me up NOW
I'm also annoyed at my horoscope for not warning me of my perils
Just walk-of-shame'd past fifteen little girls at summer camp. Take a good look girls, I am you in twelve years.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and hes going back to rehab like me, so we have common interests
He got about halfway through singing "Drift Away" before he passed out and broke my coffee table.
What are you doing? Did I punch you in the face last night?
So a list of things I should stay away from bringing up at dinner with your fiance tonight?
1) you and I went to a strip club 2) i saw you topless at said strip club 3) i cried when we watched the Real World
I just wanna lay in my bed all bundled up as have someone feed me lettuce
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Solid teamwork gives us a good shout of both bringing home trophy cougs
This hurricane better not stop me from sitting on the stoop thurs & enjoying all the slutty costume walkofshamers
I tried to walk home in my heels. And I fell into a snow bank. And then I cried and a policeman came up to me and said I can't sit in a snowbank and got me a cab. So maybe that's where I left my credit card. I remember the cop asking me if I was old enough to drink, too. OMG. How embarrassing. Pretty sure I told him to "leave me alone."
I mean, she's batshit insane and once choked a guy with one hand but she's still MILF material in my book.
I'm going to use this quarantine time to improve my blowjob skills.
if my 20s were a chapter in my autobiography, it would be called "the room is spinning and my hands smell like dick"
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