im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
Jager Bombs are cool, but hydrogen bombs are where it's at. Sparks and jager equals instant black out, I mistakenly tried eating a cigarette thinking it was a nacho.
so I think he was half asleep, but he woke me up by saying "where's my cow? Is it being shipped?" He must have been dreaming about farmville..
we had you propped up in a chair and fed you donuts. i've never seen you happier
whenever music plays i find myself always doing kegels to the beat. its like the new foot-tapping
you were sleeping on the floor, then you woke up and told me you were not comfy enough. You took the carpet in the bathroom put it in the bath and you slept there.
I was throwing up in the shower. He was throwing up on me. It was a cute couple moment for us.
future-me showed up mid trip and gave us a thumbs up.
Nothing quite like coming out of an alcohol induced blackout walking down Spruill Avenue carrying a silver briefcase full of IT tools you don't know where they came from. This is my life.
It was a fight. Me vs nature and drunkenness. And nature won. Big time.
If you're ever desperate for a guy's #, ask him to call your lost cell phone so you can find it. Some genius used that on me last night. FML
It's not vacation until I get called "disgustinly sexy" by an fat woman whose older than my mother.
He went in for a kiss so I shook his hand instead.
So, were you planning on telling me you left your panties in my glovebox??
Why are you hurting?
Tried to drink all the beer in Nashville last night....failed.
Randomize
