I play with my boobs when I'm bored. I playwith my nipples whe I'm drunk
Hooked up with my old baby sitter last night, so what do I do? As I was sucking her tits I decided it would be a good idea to say " goo goo gah gah"....it wasn't a good idea.
you said grace in the diner. 5am, drunk, grace. you thanked the man w the mushroom cut for the wonderful supply of screwdrivers
just got off the metro to throw up and got back on like it ain't no thang
really making moves this morning i see
someday when you wake up in a dumpster we'll have to have this conversation again...
I love that my brother has just convinced my dad that smoking a blunt it an "unspoken family tradition"
Technically my penis started a fight tonight
I just wanted to let u know that I called the taco people and informed them what the fuck is up.
the conference was great. we had to hide the acid in a planter in front of the department of agriculture though
Did he think I was flirting with him when I ordered a hot dog bc no
Too stoned. Randomly can't get the image of Emilio estevez's smiling face out of my head. What is life.
I let him stay at my place since i had to work early and when i got home there was a fruit snack wrapper in my bed. I dont have any fruit snacks. Which means he brought his own fruit snacks to the fuck session.
He kept referring to my giving him head as a new level in our relationship and acting sentimental
You gave him a bj, not a kidney
We moved the bed and she found my vibrator. The entire ride home was a montage of her singing "Are You Lonesome Tonight"
so i put my jacket on last night that you wore last weekend, and reach inside the pockets and find them full of goldfish...
the snack that smiles back:)
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