If I sit on the seam of my jeans just the right way when the bass hits, this might be my new favorite band.
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
Whoever had sex in my bed during the party last night left a glow in the dark condom on my floor. I'm not even mad anymore, I just want to know who it is so they can tell me where to get one.
Professor took us out for drinks. She said if I ordered the 64oz "Call a Cab," she'd give me an A. I drank it in 5 minutes. A+?
Check that he is NOT ok. He just heated up SoCo and used it as syrup on his pancakes.
We need to buy some popsicles so we can remind ourselves we're good at this.
Got so drunk in South Padre some guy put me on a suitcase trolly and pushed me to my room. I flashed my boobs as a tip.
My going away gift was all of them dancing around with solo cups on their dick and balls...these are my friends
someone snapchatted me a porn of two guys dressed up as pterodactyls double teaming a girl
We can't go out this weekend. My uterus is so desperate it's given me permanent beer goggles
did i just pee glitter
I feel like that xmas present negates everything we were taught as little girls. Putting out DOES pay. God bless us everyone
I don't trust my subconscious. It sleeps with my exboyfriend sometimes.
I love you. I would never turn you into a bear.
Randomize
