i'm going to be one of those im-wearing-a-shirt-as-a-dress girls today. dont make fun of me, i need laid
worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
so its official, girls can see a boner through my snuggie.
I have hooked up with someone in EVERYONE OF MY CLASSES.
That's how you know you deserve to be a senior
Your two fuck buddies playing ping pong together. HOW. ADORABLE!
Check out this gay circle: I've now hooked up with my ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend, and most recently my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend's ex-fling.
We should start a Help That Bitch Out Fund and split the donations evenly between you two.
Seriously, I am going to crawl in a hole, sew my vagina shut, and spit acid on any man that comes near me.
Let's get weird.
It's 10 am...
I'm assuming that means you're not busy...
No I don't want to see you. You're the reason that I'm going to need a new liver by the time I'm 30.
I'm giving random strangers at the bar sips of my fishbowl, then telling them I have Ebola. It's a fun night.
You can get gift cards to the liquor store! This changes everything.
No feeling is better than coming home from your booty call and putting on a fresh pair of granny panties
All I remember is that I was trying to call my wolf pack by howling.
If my one night stand asked me to move in with him right after does it still count as a one nighter?
Randomize
