none of my boyfriends are responding right now, I thought I had enough to avoid this problem
Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
don't tell her this, but while we were doing it doggy style I picked up my phone and changed my status to "who let the dogs out"
I would give away a ton of these clothes but I doubt there are any homeless people who dress as slutty as me
you started crying because you didn't get to wear your rainboots this week so i turned on the shower and let you jump around in it
youre the best friend ever
His drunken night ended with a "car accident" which really meant he was stuck in a toy car and pushed down the steps.
Listen, you can whine about not having a "red" wine glass, or you can suck it up and chug it from the vase like the rest of us. The choice is yours.
Hold on, I gotta pump breast milk for the white russians.
ok it turns out chain mail does not protect against falling down a flight of stairs. please send help.
like every night i go out someone always suggests nipple hugs so that's why I always end up topless
Word my sister pulled through for me and brought vodka shooters for the plane. its about to be a sloppy 4 hours
You have all semester to unpack your car, quarter jello shots only last until 10.
You thought there were zombies attacking us so you tried to tuck and roll out of a moving vehicle. Also you should consider wearing underwear
I am descending into that finals week rage fueled by ramen, mountain dew and bad sex is what's up.
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
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