We need to have an Itty-Bitty Titty Committee mtg somewhere in the range of 5 minutes to ASAP.
We named our party play list daddy issues
she reminds me of the kind of girl who'd fuck in church if you asked. I can dig it.
The best was having to tell my 16y/o cuz and her bf that we could see him fingering her in the inner tube. Lucky for them, I'm the cool cousin... and was river-level fuckedup.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
1 I really miss college walks of shame 2 I think I may have killed this girls cat
i'm in that phase where i'll swallow anything except food
She just tricked me into telling her the balance of my 401k... She's like a gold digging jedi mind trick ninja
She told me I made the cut, and to write my name and number on the white board by the door. I was the 7th number down.
Post walk of shame: realized the underwear I put on when I left was another girl's underwear.... woof
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
omg so there's this guy on the roof and he just stripped for no reason and now i think he's making out on the rooftop with some other guy? who are these people
I put in a tampon while driving a moving vehicle. I feel like this is simultaneously a new low and the sort of feat that deserves a merit badge.
I HAVE TOO MICH DICK TALKING TO ME IDK WHAT TO DO.
maybe i should limp back to therapy...
oh yeah will you also bring home vodka i wanna do shots on the roof
Gave his drunk ass water, & he poured it on my shirt while saying "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!" When reminded of it today he replied with, "at least you came in first place"
Drunk me just want to text sober me for saving that half rack of ribs I loves you
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