What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
If Jon and Kate can get divorced...how hard can it be for me?
Best news of the day: the hot chick at the funeral was NOT related to me... Thank god
I just remember getting him back by licking the window on his truck.
both the worst and best vomit ever... it was extra chunky and thick cause of the sausage... but it also tasted like delicious sausage... also cause of the sausage
I ended up giving him head, i think it was mostly a defensive move so that he wouldn't discover i was wearing those onesy spanx
We made a drinking game out of Project Runway. Gay guys are so fun.
What can I say, we hook up during the holidays.. We're a seasonal couple
All she said to me last night is that when her eyes roll back, to release my choke hold.
Thanks in advance for a great weekend. Sorry your roommates are going to hate you after I leave. They need to loosen up anyways.
Fuck that. I will get OUT of CONTROL And rise from a hangover on Sunday like Jesus himself.
you're the one asking for my vibrator at 4 in the morning so reconsider your life
Impressive. I've never gotten straight denied and then chased the guy naked out of my own apt. I'll remember that next time.
It's that whole "half Japanese, half asshole" thing. My brother and I have found that people really go for that
I'm never going out with the ashleys again. it was whoreible. terrifyingly whoreible.