? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
Im about to have a threesome, Ill pay you twenty bucks to go clean my room. Just throw it all in the closet.
My picture of a beer can in a McDonalds cup full of ice got more likes than my relationship with her. Is beer THAT much better than monogamy?
Just grabbing my bra from a history teacher's desk in the Humanities building. Maybe I should stop drinking on weeknights
I'll even be awesome and bring pizza for your family, just as a "hey thanks for letting a stranger get trashed at your house" gesture.
Don't worry, I could have been accepted their by waving my dick at the admissions building.
I'm honestly considering asking her if I can eat her out, as a friend.
Somehow I ended up in a different costume dancing with some tree of a guy in the basement bathroom, what did you give me?
you dont know your limits until you wake up with a black eye and a bruised rib and find out you got ran over by a bicycle last night
It's like those toothpaste commercials where 4 out of 5 dentists would recommend your vagina
I woke up this morning and had to retrieve my clothes from the flagpole, they were using my boxers as a makeshift rally flag for drinking. Yeah last night was a success.
Hmmm, well all I'm saying is don't do anything too irrational because you miss him and are blinded by his large penis.
All I'm saying is there better be a bow on your dick for my birthday
I mean, I was going to use them for a beading project, but I guess I could take one and let you bat my dick around like a cat toy.
U were so upset when the shower ruined ur nachos. I didn't kno what to do.
Randomize
