Fuck u you updated twitter but didn't answer my text
I know you're alive
so I got guilt tripped into giving her a new years kiss, and she proceeded to try and eat my face while mounting me. when you give a mouse a cookie...
I can't believe he would be such an ass
Your boobs are way too big for you to be worrying about anything.
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We are lost. Everyone is drunk and it all went downhill after we iced the bus driver.
She passed out on the kitchen table with two mickeys forties duct taped to her hands. Clearly she is going to fit perfectly in your house this semester
Can I bring some rope too? It's not too early for bondage talk, is it?
Going to the bathroom drunk while wearing overalls is such a struggle
$1 drinks and Playboy theme. I am never leaving this place
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He ended up buying the equivalent of dinner at a Mexican place, in weed
All I've done today is make sangria and wonder what the hell I'm doing with my life.
Well, he kept asking me if I was going to murder him once we got upstairs. It sort of killed the mood.
Most people would agree that it IS in fact slutty to give someone head for free ice cream.
I forget, are we banging TA’s for grades this semester or not?
Depends on how cute he is
A piece of your chipped nail polish just fell out of my crotch.
Randomize